How (Not) to Conjure a Boyfriend by Jordon Greene: review

3/5 stars on Goodreads

How (Not) to Conjure a Boyfriend by Jordon Greene

This is a queer YA retelling of Sandra Bullock-Bill Pullman movie While You Were Sleeping from 1995, which I loved back in the day, but which probably isn’t well known among the YA target (unless they’re middle-aged women like me.) Knowing the plot, I read this mostly to find out how or if the story would differ from the original. There weren’t any surprises, but the story worked well.

Mackenzie is 17, nonbinary semi-orphan with a chronically depressed mother and a one-sided crush on Hayden, 18, a client at the café Kenzie works at. One night, Hayden slips, hits his head, and falls into coma. To get to see him in the hospital, Kenzie lies that they’re his enbyfirend, which the nurse tells to Hayden’s family. To Kenzie’s surprise, everyone is so delighted that Kenzie doesn’t want to reveal the truth. Especially when they’re invited into the kind of loving, warm family they don’t have at home.

The only person who doesn’t believe Kenzie is Zach, 17, Hayden’s equally gorgeous brother. He and Kenzie end up spending time together, and to their horror, Kenzie realises they’re falling for Zach. But instead of coming clean, they double down on the lie. All sorts of misunderstandings and missed opportunities to tell the truth take place, until Hayden wakes up, bringing an end to the lie.

This was a cute, feelgood queer romance, but it never rose to the level of the themes it introduced: gender identity, queerness, or mental health. All characters were understanding and sympathetic, no one was judgemental some misgendering notwithstanding, and no bad things happened. Kenzie’s mother roused from her depression to show some warmth, and even clearing up the lie went without complications. The ending was a bit abrupt, but conclusive and good.

Kenzie was a good character, with a lot going on in their life. I don’t know how well they represented an NB person, and they never reflect on their gender identity. We get more about them being a witch. Mostly they came across as a very typical YA heroine with their inner monologue—all their behaviour or self-expression was fairly feminine—or a Twinkie gay man. The narrative was from Kenzie’s POV, so side characters, Zach included, weren’t terribly well fleshed out. The bestie existed to show sympathy and support. Zach and Hayden’s parents were inspired by Bullock and Pullman. The witchy stuff was also inspired by Bullock’s Practical Magic (1998).

The plot followed the beats of the original. There was no conflict beyond the lie, so the mid-part of the book felt a bit long with filler events where Kenzie and Zach got to know each other. For a YA novel, school didn’t feature except for a couple of mentions, which was both refreshing and odd. All in all, this was an easy read that paid nice homage to the original without rising above it or introducing anything new.

I received a free copy from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

Agnes Aubert’s Mystical Cat Shelter by Heather Fawcett: review

4/5 stars on Goodreads

Agnes Aubert’s Mystical Cat Shelter by Heather Fawcett

I really liked Fawcett’s Emily Wilde series, so I was eager to read Agnes Aubert’s Mystical Cat Shelter. It’s set in 1920s Montreal, a location that isn’t exactly overused in fantasy, in a world where a handful of people have ability for magic. Magicians aren’t outlawed, but they’re not entirely tolerated, because they’re careless with their magic, hurting people for fun. And none are more reviled than Havelock Renard, the Witch King, who has almost ended the world with his spell three years earlier.

Agnes Aubert is in her mid-thirties, a widow and an owner of a cat shelter in a town where people don’t really understand the need to shelter cats. A random magic battle on the street outside her shop has left it inhabitable, and she’s searching for a new place before winter comes. Unfortunately, the potential landlords all balk when they hear about the cats.

Out of options, she rents a shop everyone tells her she should stay away from. Even she knows it, sensing something odd about the place, but she’s been inexplicably drawn to it. Everything goes well at first, even if odd people she knows are magicians show up regularly and disappear into the back room where she’s been instructed not to explore.

But then she’s attacked in her shop by a magician who demands an artefact she has no idea about—and a man emerges to defend her. He turns out to be no other than Havelock Renard himself, who is keeping a secret magic artefact shop in her cellar. The magician attacking them is his sister, Valérie.

Havelock is sure he doesn’t have the artefact, but Agnes has a different notion. She has her cats to protect, so she starts unearthing the item from Havelock’s collections. But Valérie isn’t the only person causing the shop trouble. The police are after Havelock too. And to her surprise, Agnes finds she’s not willing to hand him over.

This was a delightful cozy fantasy. In its centre are two sets of siblings with very different dynamics. Agnes has a loving, supporting sister Élise, who goes to battles with her on all fronts. Havelock has a more complicated relationship with his sister who has turned maniac with power. He knows he needs to defeat her, but all he sees is the person who used to take care of him. Magical system is interesting and I’d love to explore the origin world more. And always, everywhere, there are cats getting into places they shouldn’t be, with proper roles and characters.

There’s also a romance of sorts. Agnes is still healing from losing her husband, though it’s been long enough that’s she’s willing to consider a new love. Havelock isn’t really a people person—or not entirely a person anymore, as magic eats away people—so romance is a mystery to him. In the end, it really doesn’t go anywhere, so I hope there’s a follow-up book. The ending is open enough on that front.

However, the book is a bit small in scope, as befits a cozy fantasy. Montreal barely features except in street names that are in French (though I don’t know if they’re real streets) and the fact that people speak French and occasionally English both. The historical setting doesn’t entirely come alive, as everything basically takes place in one location. Side characters seldom have direct dialogue, so they seem like props. A lot seems to be happening on the background that affects the plot—Élise’s husband is a politician fighting for re-election; mages are causing havoc; the police are hunting magicians—but they solve themselves rather easily. Agnes is more concerned about her cats, which stalls the plot in the middle.

But in the end, it’s human ingenuity that wins the day, the ending is conclusive and good, and though the romance didn’t really happen, it leaves Agnes and Havelock in a good place. All cats found homes. I’d read more.

Jitterbug by Gareth L. Powell: review

3/5 stars on Goodreads

Jitterbug by Gareth L. Powell

Jitterbug is set in near future of our solar system that’s been drastically altered. All the outer planets have vanished one by one by invisible forces, with Mars being currently devoured. It’s only a matter of time before the Earth is gone. In their place has appeared a ring of artificial planetoids shaped like wedges of orange that curve towards the sun with nothing on the backside towards the outer space. The humanity has inhabited the insides of these planetoids.

Criminals, too, like to hide in the vastness of these new habitats, and to capture them, a system of bounty hunters has emerged. Copernicus Brown and his three-person crew (two women and a man) are bounty hunters on Jitterbug, a former freight ship he has inherited from his father. A distress call brings them to a scene of a pirate attack, from which they save a woman, Amber Roth. Things go sideways from there.

Roth is carrying a message that people are willing to kill for. It brings the crew to the attention of a leading politician, and together, they go to the outside of the spheres to find the origin of the message—only to learn that the humanity is about to come under attack by alien forces. Are they the same who created the sphere in the first place or is something else going on? Whatever it is, Jitterbug and her crew has to deal with it and fast.

This was a competent sci-fi adventure, a small-scale space opera. Told by four first-person point of view characters, one of which is Jitterbug herself, it brings the humanity to the brink of extinction and offers an out of space and time solution to it. It wasn’t entirely engaging though. It was mostly narrated to the reader, and apart from the first chapters, the first-person narrators didn’t manage to bring the reader in the story with them. The intimacy of first-person wasn’t there, and the reader didn’t learn anything about the characters except what was necessary for the scene. The inevitable romance especially suffered from this, when neither narrator even hinted at romantic feelings before it was already a reality.

The ending twisted this readers brain, but I’m not going to question the time-bending solution. It brings the story to a full circle, the prologue finally getting an explanation in the epilogue. It’s a satisfying ending for this standalone story. No need for more.

I received a free copy from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

The Library of Amorlin by Kalyn Josephson: review

3/5 stars on Goodreads

The Library of Amorlin by Kalyn Josephson

The Library of Amorlin starts The Age of Beasts fantasy, and it was one of my anticipated reads for the start of the year. The beginning was promising, but unfortunately, the book didn’t deliver.

The setting is interesting. A world of several kingdoms around a neutral zone of a magical library that bends time and space within its limits. The library is in charge of protecting magical beasts and mediating between kingdoms. Unfortunately, Kalthos, one of the kingdoms, is ruled by a religion that sees the beasts as embodiments of sins, and systematically destroys them. As beasts die, magic becomes more unpredictable and the natural order of things begin to unravel. So, Kalthos and the library are at direct odds.

The premise is good too. Kasira, in her late twenties, is a con-artist who grew up on the streets of Kalthos until she was captured. She was held imprisoned in inhuman conditions for four years, after which the sentence was commuted to hunting and killing beasts as part of elite killing units, which she’s been doing for the past three years. And then she’s offered a chance for freedom by Vera, the Kalthos ambassador to Amorlin: con her way into the library and bring it under Kalthos’s rule. She has three months. Fail and it’s back to prison.

Kasira sets out to convince the librarian, Allaster, that she’s not a Kalthos spy. He doesn’t believe her. He’s right. She pulls off a couple of cons and manages to change his mind. And then a twist happens, which changes things for Kasira, sort of but not. And then another twist, upping the stakes but not. And then the final con that brings the book to a satisfying conclusion with no cliffhanger ending.

Technically, this all should’ve made for an interesting book. Problem is, there’s no plot. There are events that spring out of nowhere and end as fast, with no aftermath or consequences. The events include cons that Kasira pulls, but how she does them isn’t shown on the page. What readers see is her reading books, tending to beasts, and training with Allaster. The plot that affects them both happens elsewhere. There is a war brewing and a possible coup taking place in Kalthos, on top of the battle for the library, and on the background, Vera is pulling strings.

The final continues the same. The reader is shown one thing, only to learn that Kasira has pulled something on the background. On the surface, it’s interesting, but not as interesting as following her along it would’ve been. The end result is satisfying and clever, but it leaves the reader cold.

From the reader’s point of view, Kasira has no agency in her own story. There are the cons, but the reader isn’t shown them, and the small wins she creates are made void by an outside influence that always trumps her efforts, forcing her to react instead of being in charge. We’re only seemingly following Kasira’s story, but what we get is Vera’s efforts on the background.

When the protagonist is a con-artist, I expect to be shown how they plan the cons, and whether they can pull them off, especially since some here seemed a bit impossible. I don’t want a smug admission after the fact that “I made this happen,” without being shown—or even told—how. The surprise factor isn’t interesting. Kasira comes off as useless, boring and smug on the page. That she makes things work in the end is fine, but doesn’t feel like a win when we’ve not seen her do it.

Allastair, who also has point of view chapters, isn’t any better. He’s grabbling with a magical condition that already killed his predecessor. He’s 130 years old and he still hasn’t found the solution. All we ever see him doing, when he’s not mistrusting Kasira, is reading. He comes off as waffling and useless. The same goes with the few side characters. They all have issues on the background that affect how they act, with some surprises, but again, it’s not shown on the page.

Without a plot, the author is forced to use the out of the blue twists to make the story more interesting. All it would’ve taken is to give the main characters something proactive to do and show it to the reader. Anything that would take the reader along the ride, anticipate and fear with them. The events of the ending especially suffered from this. Kasira is clever, but we get nothing but the aftermath. There wasn’t even a proper romance yet to make things exciting.

All this is to say that this was a boring book. There’s no reason to read it; just skip to the end. It took me ages to finish, and that’s not including the couple of days after the second twist around 60% mark when I stopped reading completely. I almost didn’t pick it up again, but forced myself to finish. The ending was more conclusive than I expected, and it was good enough to leave the story here.

I received a free copy from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

Apparently, Sir Cameron Needs to Die by Greer Stothers: review

4/5 stars on Goodreads

Apparently, Sir Cameron Needs to Die by Greer Stothers

Apparently, Sir Cameron Needs to Die is a cozy fantasy, of sorts. In a world not our own, or maybe it is, mad sorcerer Merulo—not called mad yet—declares in front of the entire court that he’s going to kill the god and put an end to magic. Forty years later, he’s still at it, only now he’s also at war with the church, which obviously doesn’t want their god to be killed.

The war isn’t going well for the church, but the Elder comes up with a prophecy for which she sacrificed the heart of last dragon, a great source of magic in a world where magic isn’t unlimited. Sir Cameron, a knight of church, needs to be killed by a specific method at a specific spot to bring the downfall of Merulo.

Cameron has coasted being a knight by avoiding battles when possible. His greatest fear is dying, which is very probable when fighting the sorcerer. So, when he learns about the prophecy, he doesn’t choose a noble self-sacrifice like the church assumes, but flees. The only place he can flee to is Merulo.

The sorcerer isn’t happy that he’s there, but since Cameron not dying is in his interests, he takes him in. Thing is, the prophecy is very specific and Cameron needs to die as he is, a beautiful blond man. Transforming him into a vulture isn’t a problem, then. Merulo prefers him being a vulture even, because Cameron has a very specific bodily reaction to being threatened and intimidated. Cameron doesn’t mind being a vulture as such, but having a human body would be better, so he sets out to cajole Merulo, until he has his body back, by way of being turned a woman.

At this point, the story had been a fairly amusing romp of Cameron’s attempts to survive by seducing Merulo. The young man is conceited and a bit obtuse, but good-natured and willing to help Merulo, even though he doesn’t understand Merulo’s need to kill the god when he’ll lose not only his magic but probably his life too. However, the joke was growing stale and it wasn’t even mid-point yet. Not even the attempts of Cameron’s former elf squire Glenda to hunt Cameron to kill him personally amused.

I was ready to put the book down, but then a couple of twists in short succession switched the story to a new gear. The tone changed too from a sex comedy to more mellow search for connection and family. Merulo gets help in his endeavour, and after forty years, he’s finally ready to kill the god and change the world forever. Cameron isn’t happy about it, because he’s learned to love the cantankerous old sorcerer and doesn’t want him to die, but since that’s what Merulo wants, he’ll be there to the end.

And then there was another twist, which quite frankly didn’t work very well. There had been many hints, but it completely switched the tone for the rest of the book from a secondary world fantasy to something opposite. The book should’ve ended before that; it would’ve been a good ending. With the twist, the book would’ve needed much more story than we got to make it work. The epilogue is fairly open ended though, so maybe there will be a sequel exploring what comes after. I’d definitely want to know how the world will fare, and have answers to a few questions that were ignored, like Glenda’s lack of emotions, and why Cameron’s father hated him, because it wasn’t solely for being gay. And what happened to the chancellor?

The story had potential, but it was much too long for the plot. The world felt constantly off, but that was deliberate, considering its origins—which also turned out to be a small let-down. Cameron was a fun character and easy to root for despite being conceited—and he had an upsetting awakening regarding that. Merulo stayed true to his character throughout even after learning to love too. Glenda’s POV chapters promised more than they gave and, in the end, she was pushed aside for another character. I’m especially disappointed in the latter, a half-dragon witch. The way she was presented gave to understand she would have a compassionate impact on the characters. 

The story had its fun moments, but never more than a chuckle. Cameron pestering Merulo for sex was constant, but when the other finally gave in, the scenes ended and were never mentioned again. Not even when Cameron was a woman to compare matters. There were hints about Cameron’s preferred gender, but nothing was made of that either, even though he got to experience being woman, only to want to be a man again. The pace was fast and light-hearted almost throughout. Chapter headings were fun and worth reading, but they too often promised insights that were never shown on the page.

All in all, this is a difficult book to rate. I’m dithering between three and four stars, but since it was well-written, the author managed to bring the rather impossible story to a satisfying end, the characters were good, and the twists interesting, I will give it four stars.

I received a free copy from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.